*This article originally appeared on Babble but I feel it is still very relevant, so I am reproducing it here.

It's 2016: Why Are We Still Not Talking About Menopause?

 They say that 50 is the new 40 etc… but what does that really mean?  

I’ve been taking stock of both my inner life and my physical being lately.  I look down at the skin on my arms and I think, does that skin really belong to me?  Where did that smooth skin go?  How did this happen without me noticing?  I put on a dress or a top I haven’t worn in a while and I know right away it is wrong, too youthful. 

A few months ago I woke up feeling hot, as if a current of heat was surging through my body. I thought, ah, I understand now.  This could be the start of menopause.  I knew 55 was late.  I don’t know why I was surprised by it, but I was.  I‘d lately been unable to sleep through the night and during the day sometimes had found it hard to focus.  I felt like I was in a fog with a layer of mesh between myself and the world. Sometimes my heart would beat too fast, like I’d had a surge of adrenalin.  I wondered if this was a normal symptom of menopause or did I have post traumatic stress syndrome from the lava that nearly covered our town last year.

I marveled over how much I used to accomplish in one day.  Now I just didn’t have the energy. Should I give in to this feeling and slow down or power through the way I’d always done.

 I found I knew nothing about menopause beyond the existence of hot flashes.  Why hadn’t any of my friends talked about it? Surely some of them were through it already since I knew it could start as early as 40.  Pregnancy, birth control and fertility were now mainstream topics.  Why was menopause still considered embarrassing?  

I trolled the internet for articles on menopause and its stages, looking for a way to embrace this new stage of my life that matched my personal approach to health and wellness, which is eating healthy but not too strictly, moderate alcohol intake combined with yoga, walking, swimming and biking.

 Ironically, I happened upon a book called The Wisdom of Menopause by Christiane Northrup M.D. at the chiropractor’s office.  I laughed at myself because I couldn’t wait to get into bed to read it that night.  Here, I thought, could be the answer my questions.

I learned I’m now in a stage called peri-menopause, which is the period before the monthly menses stop completely, when they taper off after becoming irregular. One of the first things the book mentioned was how during this stage, as the hormones in a woman’s body fluctuate, the brain is “rewiring” and how it can be a very creative time in a woman’s life if open to it. I was glad to read this because until then I’d only heard about women going through “the change” acting hormonal and crazy.

It rang true to me because after 20 years of taking care of my children, my husband, running an internet Hawaiian Flower business and a household, I had lately begun to reconsider my priorities.  What did I want for myself in this next chapter of my life? What did I want to do for fun?  I found I didn’t know and it was disturbing.  I’ve had many enjoyable times with my family but mostly my life has revolved around their activities.  Now, with my son away at college and my daughter driving, I was suddenly left at loose ends with blocks of afternoon time to fill.  I have tried to remember who I was before I became a wife and mother and found that I am now a completely different person and will need to be intuitive and look inside myself to discover the answer to that these questions organically.

Another book I’m finding helpful is “Natural Choices for Women’s Health” by Dr. Laurie Steelsmith.  She discusses how the “secrets of natural and Chinese medicine can create a lifetime of wellness”. 

Steelsmith presents both HRT (hormone replacement therapy) or the combined use of nutrition, vitamins, herbs and herbal supplements with a healthy diet as two alternative approaches to menopause and peri-menopause to counter the mood swings, lack of energy,  hot flashes and loss of sleep that accompany it.  Western Medicine “diagnoses” menopause as a lack of estrogen.   HRT seeks to counteract the effects by using hormones either synthetically created in a lab or derived from animals (specifically from the urine of pregnant horses) to scientifically replace and manage a woman’s hormone levels.  In recent years though, there has been controversy about HRT.  In a study done by the Women’s Health Initiative, synthetic and animal derived hormones were linked to heart disease, strokes and breast cancer.

Steelsmith recommends that if you choose to go the HRT route, to choose hormones “that are both bio-identical and natural” and that “each woman has individual needs and must decide for herself whether the risks are worth the benefits”. 

The women in my yoga class have been good sources of information too and have made me feel more comfortable with what is happening with my body.

One woman has had favorable results using a topical estrogen cream.

The owner of my local natural foods store recommended making a tea of red clover or alfalfa to lessen symptoms of menopause such as hot flashes.  He explained these herbs contain phytoestrogens or plant based estrogens that mimic the estrogen hormones naturally present in our bodies until the advent of menopause.

My personal physician has recommended taking a women’s multivitamin and a calcium magnesium supplement to combat the loss of bone density that occurs during menopause

After gathering information from the internet, books, friends and my physician, my personal choice (for now) will be to decline HRT and proceed through peri-menopause using herbs and supplements, combined with a balanced diet and exercise.  

I will re-evaluate how I’m feeling in six months, but for now I am comfortable with this new knowledge culled from all of these different sources.  I am ready to fully embrace this journey to the next stage of my life and welcome the positive changes such as renewed energy (once I’m through it) and creativity.

I hope to set a good example for my daughter by openly talking about menopause, so that someday when the time comes for her she won’t feel the dread and shock but will feel it is all part of the circle of life.

The Joy of Nia

By Jill Steele

Yoga classes are in abundance here in Puna, but for years, I had been hoping to find a dance class.  About a year ago my friend Kim invited me to go to a Nia class.  “What is Nia,” I asked.

She said, “It’s kind of a dance class.  Just come, it’s fun”.  She picked me up along with a few other friends one Saturday morning and we drove to Hawaiian Sanctuary in Pahoa (also known as MM12 or mile marker 12),   a beautiful eco retreat and permaculture center created out of jungle. 

Nia, a combination of martial arts and modern dance movements, is an excellent cardio workout since you’re in constant movement for an hour, but it’s so much more than just a workout.

The music is exotic- world music with Indian, Middle Eastern, disco and European electronica influences.

Our teacher, Valusha, a young, Russian former gymnast, has long dreadlocks piled on top of her head and dresses in flowing clothing all cut on the bias and with swooping hems that swirl when she dances.   Her choreographies are challenging, designed by the Nia organization to improve brain function, with arm and leg movements competing with each other. 

We sway and step to the music, trying to follow her, each interpreting her movements in our own way. “Watching Valusha is a beautiful sight,” my friend Kim said.  

What I like about Nia is that there are no levels of expertise.  Anyone can do it and you don’t need prior dance experience.  There is no leaping or presenting across the floor as in traditional dance classes and there are no impossible to get into poses as in yoga.  

YET, there is a letting go of the exterior world aspect like yoga.  It is dreamy to dance continuously for an hour without conversation and I felt peaceful and happy even after my first Nia class.

Valusha Boyko

Nia instructors are certified through a teacher training program and Valusha cautions us as we begin each class about the importance of aligning our knees over our ankles.  She brings her own brand of spirituality to the practice, sometimes stating a theme for the class, such as a part of the body we should focus on as we dance or imagery as we do a movement.

One of my fellow dancers said, “It teaches me how to feel and sense in my body.  I love the movements. It challenges me to move in different ways.”

Another said, “I like the physicality of it and I like the mental challenge of losing my inhibitions.”

If you live in Puna and are looking to add something to your fitness and spiritual routine, I highly recommend Nia.  If you’re a tourist visiting Puna and already know about Nia, all the better!  You couldn’t find a more unique location in which to do it than at Hawaiian Sanctuary with Valusha.  

For additional information about Nia, check out the Nia Now website. Valusha teaches at Hawaiian Sanctuary on Fridays from 4-5 p.m and on Saturdays from 10:30 to 11:30. 

Jade's Gong Bath

This past Friday, the day after the fall equinox, I went to a Gong Bath.  What you ask is a gong bath?  The advertising flyer invited the public to “Come bliss out to gentle Kundalini yoga, with transformative meditations, a symphony of gong, singing bowls, didgeridoo and tuning forks”.  It was titled “The Mothership, An Epic Equinox Offering a Magical Journey into the Primordial Sound Current.”

Currently, I am in the throes of grieving for my mother and finding each day a challenge. I practice daily yoga but this type of class was beyond the realm of my comfort zone.   As I read the flier I formed a mental picture of how it would be and thought, YES,  this might help me to temporarily move beyond the physical world and without the aid of drugs and alcohol.  I hoped it could release some of my pain and that after I’d feel less of the heaviness that was now ever-present and feel more at peace with her passing. 

I invited a friend because I didn’t feel brave enough to attend something like this for the first time on my own.  We arrived early to suss out the crowd and find spaces.  Some of the attendees wore yoga clothing but the majority of the crowd wore loose, bohemian drawstring pants, sarongs with blouses and caftans.   Already I felt I had entered another world. The fragrance of sandalwood and patchouli were in the air.  One couple arrived with yoga mats and a large blanket for two and then set up in a corner as if camping.  When I saw them and the beatific smiles on their faces, I knew we were about to experience something special and also that they must be regulars.

Our leader, Jade Rajbir Kaur, was dressed in white with a “tree of life” emblazoned t-shirt. She wore a head wrap that made her look regal.  The musicians, also in white, sat on either side of her on the stage looking ethereal and pure, completing the tableau.   The lighting was low and the stage was rimmed with white rope lights. Fittingly, it was dusk and the effect was perfect- otherworldly.  

The event began-it seemed more “event” than yoga class, with kundalini breathing exercises while seated with our legs crossed in front of us.  We progressed repeating Sanskrit blessings and did visualization exercises to welcome the fall and attract happiness and positivity to our lives.  We connected as a group by chanting and singing in rounds and it brought the experience to another level.

For the next section we were invited to relax and listen, laying on our mats, ironically in corpse pose (shavasana).  I took in all of the sounds and vibrations of the back-round music and instruments, trying to feel peace and visualizing the happy spirit of my mother hopefully hovering somewhere nearby.

Yes, I did bliss out a bit and felt a release while doing the chanting, but I also found myself wishing for additional yoga asanas and less time in shavasana.  But that’s just me.  I’m not evolved enough yet to keep my mind free of thoughts for long and need the physical poses with which to focus upon.

I will challenge myself go to more events like this and I hope Jade will continue to inspire and enliven Puna with her presence.  You can find Jade Rajbir Kaur's future events listed on her website 

The Radiant Lotus 

Namaste

Lau Lau

Our visionist leader Smiley Burrows

Today I joined the Green Lake Gardening crew in harvesting taro and making laulau.   Laulau (literally means leaf leaf in Hawaiian) is meat or fish and sometimes with hunks of sweet potato wrapped in taro leaves and baked in an umu.  I learned that umu is the Hawaiian method of cooking above ground using heated lava rocks and banana and ti leaves for steaming as opposed to the below ground imu that is used for cooking kalua pig at a luau.

This small group of Kapoho neighbors have been meeting regularly since November, when they planted their “lava flow” garden (see my earlier posts for details about the lava flow).  

Prepping taro leaves

This community garden is a step towards Kapoho’s sustainability in preparing for a future crisis in which we might become cut off from mainland or even inter-island food sources.   This  group has become a small community within the larger community of Kapoho.  I’ve known most of these people for years by acquaintance, walking their dogs or riding by my house on bikes, but after spending just a few hours bound together by a common goal, I felt a deeper connection to them and also euphoric.

The Green Lake and Green Mountain property is heaven on earth beautiful and Smiley’s husband Gerald gave us a gift by sharing his culture.  As I harvested taro leaves I was thinking of the stuffed cabbage I make from a recipe passed down to my mother by my Hungarian grandmother.   How cool it was to harvest the leaves we would be “stuffing” and cooking the little lau lau in an oven made of rocks and sticks also from the property.  Smiley, who has embraced the Hawaiian culture of her husband, had only made lau lau in this matter once herself and by repeating the process, can now pass the recipe and the process down to her children when they’re ready.

Mahalo Gerald and Smiley for bringing so much to our community!

Ono!

The Pagoda Hotel

A few weeks ago we flew to Oahu for my daughter’s ankle surgery.  On the Big Island there is a shortage of medical specialists, so our insurance company flew us to Honolulu.  

We arrived at Honolulu International Airport in the early evening and took a taxi to the Pagoda Hotel which had been reserved and paid for by our insurance company.  Earlier in the week I had checked out the hotel’s website.  It looked like a boutique hotel comparable to the Ala Moana Hotel, where we’ve stayed a few times in the past, but with a definitely oriental motif and color scheme.  I also asked a few friends about the Pagoda.  Mostly they rolled their eyes knowing the type of hotels where we usually stay.  One even offered me the use of her Waikiki condo in case we couldn’t handle it at the Pagoda.

The hotel front and signage are retro, calling to mind Grauman’s Chinese Theater in Hollywood.  The lobby is smallish, unlike the expansive, impressive lobbies on the strip at Waikiki.  The furniture in both the lobby and rooms has nice style, is comfortable and has recently been updated but the bones of the hotel are shabby.  What sets the Pagoda hotel apart from your average 2-2.5 star hotel is the friendliness of the staff.  They really made us feel welcome.  When I spoke to the maid about a television problem, she directed us to another room on our floor, which when I peaked in, looked just like our room, but seemed to be an employee break room just like the one described in Paul Theroux’s “The Hotel Honolulu” that my husband ironically had given me to read on this trip.  At that point my daughter was laying in bed in a pain fog, having had her surgery earlier in the day.  Within 5 minutes the repairman, returned with me to our room and solved the problem, which was an issue with the remote batteries.  Because of the care we received from the staff, we began to feel at home in our room.  The shabbiness turned into coziness because we felt safe and cared for, which helped my daughter and I get through a really long day, which for her was the most painful of her young life.

The Hotel Honolulu is about a well known novelist with writer’s block, who arrives “to these mute islands humbled and broke again” to work as a manager of a 2 star hotel for his friend Buddy.  The hotel, as Theroux describes it, could be the Pagoda Hotel.   "We were the last small, old hotel in Honolulu.  The rooms were small, the elevator narrow, the lobby was tiny and the bar (the Momi's Paradise Lounge) was just a nook.”  I couldn’t find the bar at the Pagoda Hotel (even though there was a card in the room advertising it’s “happy hour” drinks).  I assume the bar they were speaking of was in the Floating Pagoda restaurant (which was not open at “happy hour” the days I was there) that is attached to the hotel.   The book is a series of vignettes about his staff, Buddy the hotel’s owner, his few friends outside of the hotel and his much younger Filipino wife and small daughter.   The hotel’s repeat visitors are also featured as main characters.  For me one of the best chapters is when the main character joins his staff in a game of Scrabble, thinking he will easily win because he thinks that as a intellectual and a writer he is so superior.  What he doesn't count on is that by their "local rules" all pidgin and Hawaiian slang words are legal.  He plays several games and finishes last or near last in every one.

On the last day after we checked out of our room, we spent 2 hours in the lobby waiting with our luggage.  We checked emails and surfed the internet to pass the time, but most entertaining was watching the hotel goings on and the interactions between the guests and the staff.  We created back stories for each group.  At one point we saw a uniformed security guard hurrying through the lobby following a male guest.   We noticed her uniform looked new and that the badge was ultra shiny.  Later we saw her speaking with what I took to be the hotel manager.  After some time I began reading the “Hotel Honolulu” again and realized we had ourselves “become” characters in the Hotel Pagoda.

By Jill Steele

In an Old Hawaiian Garden

This pic is on the cover one of my most beloved floral books.  It's an album of Hawaii's flowers called, "In an old Hawaiian Garden" with word pics by Don Blanding and floral pics by T.J. Mundorff.   Here is the first poem, which inspires me to get out into my own garden and also to share Hawaii's flowers with the world through my Hawaiian Flower business.

"There are no days throughout the year
 without some sort of flowers here
In sweet profusion, uncontrolled.
If all their many names were told
You'd weary of the endless list.
No color, tint or shape is missed
In Nature's wondrous gift to me.

I hope that I can make you see
This sun-lit, moon-witched, rainbow place
Of Beauty.  Just a little space
Quite filled with flowers, vines and trees.
Walled in with stone, the haunt of bees
And butterflies and lunar moths.
When you are passing will you pause.
Or--if you will--you will drop in and see
The garden that belongs to me.
By Don Blanding

Madame Pele 2

The lava is less than 500 feet from our beloved town of Pahoa.  The national media has descended to record this moment in history.  Our little village is now world famous. With each media outfit scrambling to get a great "scoop", there is a tendency towards sensationalizing an already exciting event.  The world is getting a different view than we who are closer to the source.  Friends and family have panicked after seeing closeups of burning, bubbling hot lava on national television, imagining lava rivers fast approaching our home, when in reality, the type of lava flow we are experiencing is a slow process.  Even though our home is 8 miles away from Pahoa, our lives will be affected profoundly when the lava crosses the highway.  We’re still not sure which of our 2 grocery stores will remain open or if we will be able to easily access any of these stores without taking lengthy detours.   The lava will be the dividing force.  New districts will be formed by Pele.  Some of my daughter’s friends are already transferring schools, moving in with friends and relatives in order to be closer to these schools. 

I’ve never been more in awe of nature than these last few months.  I’ve learned that even with careful preparation strategies, an act of nature cannot be prevented.  There is a man in Pahoa who has erected a barrier in the form of a berm of dirt to divert the lava.  We shall see in the next days and weeks what becomes as a result of that.  In doing so, he may have alienated his neighbors, who may be adversely affected as a direct result of the lava being diverted.

I’ve learned the true meaning of “go with the flow”.  We are trying to live up to this motto and not be frantic and stressed (like I have been on a few days very recently).  When people ask, “What are you going to do”,  I say “We’ll just have to wait and see”.  

 My daughter’s school, the Hawaii Academy of Arts and Sciences (HAAS) has been contingency planning for over a month.  The school is being divided into north and south campuses, the locations as yet undecided.  We’re hoping it will be smooth transition if and when it becomes necessary.   
A group of students, with two dedicated teacher advisors, have created a website and a Facebook page called Hope for HAAS. These kids, who have grown up using social media to communicate with each other, are now using it as a tool to shout out to the world about their school possibly being destroyed by lava.  The Facebook page, with 3,713 followers to date, has generated the recognition of media organizations all over the world. They have been interviewed on NBC's Hawaii News Now, CNN, have been written about in TIME Magazine and were interviewed on Radio Australia.  It has been very exciting to watch all of this evolve.  It has taken away some of the kids'  fear of the changes Pele may bring about for them personally, while empowering and strengthening their ties to their school. The Hope for HAAS group has shown the world and hopefully the Hawaii Department of Education, that public charter schools are worth funding. Currently charter schools are underfunded, receiving about half the amount per child enrolled compared with what public schools receive.    
The Hope for HAAS student group has made the best of a difficult situation, a valuable life lesson to learn at any age.  

by Jill Steele

*photos courtesy of USGS.gov and Hope for HAAS